Ice Water in Hell Read online

  “Thank you. I owe you a debt of gratitude. If you’re ever in need, you can find me here.”

  Bruga’s eyes filled with moisture. “And thank you for seeing beyond what most fear. Let me know when you find your third, and I’ll set up a meeting with one of the gentler elders.”

  Baz knew gentler was a relative term. Was there such a thing in Old Town? He lifted the case of Scotch from the floor and carried it toward the door for Bruga. He needed to find Galen, but first he had a lot of explaining to do to his friends and lover.

  Chapter Five

  Nick couldn’t wait for Bruga to leave. He wasn’t sure what the man had said to Baz, but when his lover slumped to the floor, Nick jumped from his stool. A restraining hand around his wrist from Lu was all that kept him in place.

  “What’re you doing?” Nick asked Lu.

  “If he needs you, he’ll call.”

  “Baz?”

  Baz glanced up and shook his head as he sat on the couch. “I’m okay.”

  Nick knew it was a lie. Something Bruga said was tearing his lover apart.

  Dominic set a fresh drink beside Nick. “Give them a few more minutes.”

  Nick glanced at his friend and nodded. He shook off Lu’s hold and took a drink of his stout.

  “What do you think that stuff was about a third?” Nick asked.

  Lu shook his head. “I don’t know. It makes perfect sense though. Three is one of the rare perfect numbers. It denotes divine perfection. Even in the bible, the number three appears many times. Lysander must be using that power in some way.”

  “Bruga said it had to do with past, present and future. Maybe he’s confused because not only am I Baz’s past, but also his present, and I hope to be his future.”

  Lu, who hadn’t taken his eyes off Baz, shook his head. “I don’t think so. I think Bruga is making Baz bring things to the surface he buried long ago.”

  There was a strong possibility Lu was right. “As much as I love him, I know so little about his past.”

  Lu nodded. “It’s always been as if he had no past before his death. Although he’s occasionally talked about battles he’s fought, he shares nothing personal.”

  Nick jumped up again. “Bruga’s leaving.”

  “Wait. Let Baz come to you,” Lu instructed.

  After seeing Bruga to the door, Baz turned and stared at the bar for several moments before walking over. He took the stool next to Nick, but didn’t make eye contact. Instead, Baz rested his forearms on the bar and lowered his head.

  “Can I get you something to drink?” Dominic asked.

  Baz shook his head. “No thank you. Nick and I have a lot of talking to do. But first…” Baz looked up at Lu. “I have a favor to ask of you.”

  “Okay. You know I’d do anything for you,” Lu answered.

  “I need you to find someone for me. His name is Galen Dyonysius. I still don’t understand how he could possibly be in The City, but Bruga assures me he is and that he’s in danger from Lysander.”

  “What’s this about?” Nick asked. “What does the boy you mentored have to do with this?”

  Baz turned to look at him. Nick saw the pain in the watery brown depths of his lover’s eyes. “That’s what I need to speak to you privately about.”

  Nick was at a loss as to what to say. Lu saved him by cutting into the conversation.

  “I’ll need more information on Galen. The name isn’t familiar, and I know most of The City’s population.”

  Baz bit his bottom lip. “He was murdered when he was barely eighteen, so I assume that’s the age he has taken for his eternal form. Big brown eyes, black curly hair, maybe five-foot-ten? Galen was always on the lean side, but he was a soldier, so his definition was incredible. Oh, and he has a small scar on his upper lip from one of his first training exercises.”

  With every description, Nick’s chest tightened more. How long had it been since Baz had seen Galen, yet he could describe him so accurately? More than anything Baz could tell him, it was obvious Galen was still not only in Baz’s heart, but his thoughts as well.

  Lu cleared his throat. “I think I’ve seen him.”

  “You have?” Baz asked.

  Lu shifted on his stool, looking decidedly uncomfortable. “Remember we talked about auras and their colors?”

  “Yes,” Baz answered.

  Nick was confused. “Auras?”

  Baz placed a hand on Nick’s thigh. “I’ll tell you about it later.”

  Nick covered Baz’s hand with his own. He would have to trust Baz, that much was evident.

  “Well, I told you there were a few blues, but not many,” Lu continued.

  “Yes.”

  “The boy…man I saw was the darkest shade of blue I’d ever seen. At first I thought his aura was black. It’s what drew my attention to him. Black auras don’t belong in The City. I was crossing the street to run the man back to Old Town where he belonged when I realized the aura wasn’t black at all. It was a deep, troubled blue.”

  “And you think this person is Galen?” Baz asked.

  Lu shrugged. “The description is nearly the same. The only difference is that of Galen as a soldier. The man I saw didn’t look like he could lift a sword, let alone use one.”

  “Where did you see him?” Baz’s hand gripped Nick’s thigh tighter.

  “West side. I was coming out of The Temple when I spotted him across the street.”

  Baz touched Lu’s shoulder. “Can you try to find him for us while I talk to Nick?”

  Lu nodded. “What will you do once we find him?”

  Baz looked from Lu to Nick. In the span of a few seconds, Baz’s expression went from worry to fear. He reached out and took Nick’s hand.

  “I have to appear before one of the Old Town elders and argue my case as to why Lysander shouldn’t have been allowed to claim you and Galen in the first place, but I can’t do that unless you’re both with me. Without Galen, I’ll lose you.”

  “Impossible,” Lu said, jumping up from his stool. “I’ve told you, you’re not allowed in Old Town.”

  Baz’s head tilted to the side as he gazed at Lu with pleading eyes. “Why? Because it might darken my soul? What do you think it will do to my soul if Lysander succeeds in claiming the only two men I’ve ever loved?”

  Nick closed his eyes against the pain in his chest. It wasn’t the way he’d wanted to hear Baz’s declaration of love for the first time. To hear it in conjunction with a statement of love for another man made it even harder.

  Baz’s hand cupped the side of Nick’s face. “I’m sorry.”

  “It’ll be okay. I just need time to process a few things.” Nick turned his face to kiss Baz’s palm.

  “Can we go up to your apartment?” Baz asked.

  Nick nodded, still unable to meet Baz’s gaze. It wasn’t that he felt betrayed by Baz’s feelings for another man. It was simply one more reminder of how little Baz had really shared with him over the years. Nick finished his Guinness and stood.

  “We’ll do what we can,” Dominic said. “The club opens in thirty minutes. Do you think you can handle anything that might come up?”

  Nick nodded. “Just leave word for the staff to call upstairs if they need something.”

  Baz took Nick’s hand and led him to the stairs. Nick swallowed around the lump in his throat. Why did he feel like his entire world was about to change?

  * * * *

  “Why didn’t I know about Galen?” Nick asked before Baz had a chance to sit down.

  Baz continued toward the couch. How in the world was he supposed to explain what he still struggled to understand? Although everything might come out in a jumbled mess, the time for complete honesty was upon him.

  “Guilt,” he finally said. “I don’t allow myself to speak of or think about Galen.”

  “Bullshit. You might not talk about him, but he’s obviously been on your mind,” Nick countered.

  “Maybe. Although I’ve tried to bury the memories of that t
ime in my life.” Evidently, he hadn’t done a very good job. Perhaps if he really had been able to release Galen from his heart, the younger man wouldn’t be, once again, in danger because of him.

  Baz took a deep breath as he allowed the hidden memories to rise to the surface. “I chose Galen as the boy I’d mentor when he was thirteen and I was twenty-six. It was a common practice in the Spartan community. An older soldier would take a new recruit to mentor and teach him the fighting skills he would need to survive.”

  Nick nodded. “And you fell in love with him?”

  “Yes.” Even to his own ears, the intense love he felt for Galen sounded wrong. Never mind that it was also a common thing for mentors to teach their students all aspects of becoming a man, including sex. For a Spartan soldier who was away from home for months, sometimes years at a time, it was imperative to build strong bonds with fellow soldiers, most of those bonds included sexual release.

  “It was customary for a man to marry at the age of thirty. Although I had no use for women, I knew it was my duty as a Spartan to help provide the next generation of soldiers.”

  “You were married?” Nick cut in.

  “Yes, but it wasn’t a love match. Celena tolerated me at best. She knew my preference in bed partners because I refused to hide my feelings for Galen from her. Even though I tried to do my duty to plant my seed in her womb, the roots never grew.”

  Nick’s arm stretched along the back of the couch to rest at the base of Baz’s neck.

  Baz took a chance and slid over, closer to Nick. “Is this okay?”

  Nick shook his head and Baz, although hurt, started to move away. Nick’s arms reached out and pulled Baz against his chest.

  “But this is,” Nick said.

  Baz wrapped his arms around Nick’s torso and rested his head on his lover’s chest. “My father was very angry that even after a year’s time Celena was without child. Lysander had disgraced himself in his friends’ eyes by producing only one child worthy of life, me, instead of the many strong sons their wives bore them. My father was sure I could redeem him in his friends’ graces by giving him many grandsons. When that didn’t happen, he began to go mad.”

  Baz stopped and looked up at Nick. “Can I have something to drink?”

  Nick leaned down and kissed Baz’s forehead. “Of course.”

  Baz sat up and Nick went to the kitchen. He wasn’t really thirsty, but he needed a few moments to collect his thoughts. It would serve no purpose for Nick to know all the grizzly details of the murders his father committed. It was bad enough that Galen had still been clinging to life when Lysander began hacking away at Baz.

  “Here you go, babe.” Nick handed Baz an extra large glass of red wine.

  “Thank you.” Baz took several sips before putting the glass on the table.

  “Are you okay to continue?” Nick asked.

  “No, but I know I need to.”

  “Take your time.” Nick pulled Baz against his chest once again.

  “Lysander felt the reason Celena was unable to give him a grandson was because of Galen. He told me to rid my life of my lover or suffer the consequences.”

  Baz closed his eyes and held Nick even tighter. “I thought he would disown me or ruin my name, neither of which was worth giving up the man I loved. I had no idea he would come into my home in the early morning hours and murder Galen and me as we lay in each other’s arms.”

  Nick gasped but tried to cover it by clearing his throat. “I’m sorry.”

  Baz nodded. “The last time I saw Galen, the life was pouring out of him. I probably should have tried to find him in Heaven, but I was so afraid and ashamed. I didn’t want to look into his eyes and know his life was cut short because of me. I was selfish. I wanted it all, and for a while, I had it. I didn’t know the price I’d pay for my greed.”

  “What will happen if Lu and Dominic find him?” Nick asked.

  “Not when. If. I have to believe I can keep him from suffering at my father’s hands again.”

  Nick nodded. “Okay. If. What happens to us?”

  Baz’s eyebrows drew together. “That depends on you. Will you ever forgive me for putting you in the middle of the mess with Lysander?”

  Now it was Nick’s turn to frown. “You haven’t put me in the middle of anything. Your father did that when he decided to claim me, which I still don’t understand, by the way.”

  Baz shook his head. “I don’t either. Unless, of course, he feels I haven’t already been sufficiently punished.”

  Nick pulled Baz up until they were nose to nose. “What about Galen? Will you be able to send him away again if we survive Old Town?”

  Baz wished he could deny his longing to see Galen again, but he knew he couldn’t. It would come down to Galen. The man Lu described sounded nothing like the happy, carefree eighteen-year-old Baz had loved. It was possible it wasn’t even an issue. Maybe Galen had taken another lover.

  “Baz?”

  Baz blinked. “I don’t know. I won’t know how I really feel until I see him again. Does that upset you?”

  “To be honest, it worries me more than it upsets me.”

  Baz fell a little more in love with Nick at that moment. For all his strength, Nick was incredibly insecure when it came to matters of the heart. It was hard to blame him. Baz’s track record for sticking around wasn’t the best.

  “I’m sorry I ran from you so long ago. It was wrong. I was scared.”

  “I know,” Nick acknowledged. “You ran as soon as I told you I loved you.”

  Baz shrugged. “The only thing I knew about love was how much it hurt when it was gone. I couldn’t allow myself to become entrenched in it again.”

  “And now?” Nick asked.

  “I’ve realized it didn’t matter whether I said it or even allowed myself to think it. In my heart, I felt it, even when we were apart.”

  Nick nodded and pulled Baz into a kiss. Baz opened and welcomed the tip of Nick’s tongue as he brushed the roof of his mouth.

  Despite everything that had happened, the kiss ignited Baz’s passion for Nick in a heartbeat. He moaned and tilted his head to take the kiss deeper, yanking at the tight fabric of Nick’s shirt.

  “Need you,” Baz growled between kisses. He stood and pulled the shirt over Nick’s head. Reaching down, he ran his fingers through the thick brown hair of Nick’s muscular chest, stopping to pluck and squeeze his lover’s budded nipples.

  “Bed,” Nick commanded, reaching for the button on his jeans.

  Baz nodded and helped Nick to his feet. It didn’t matter that his whole world could crash down around him at any moment. Baz needed the strength only Nick’s love could provide.

  * * * *

  Standing naked beside the bed, Nick grabbed the bottle of lube and began greasing his cock as he waited for Baz to slide under the covers. Once Baz was settled, Nick handed his lover the slick before he climbed onto the bed.

  It hadn’t even been twelve hours since he was last buried inside Baz’s ass, but he was as nervous as he’d been their first time. There was something about Baz that had always called to Nick. Pleasing his lover had always been his priority.

  Nick brushed Baz’s fingers away from the sweet hole he loved so much and replaced them with his own. He started with two, needing Baz to really feel it.

  Baz moaned. “So good.”

  Nick replied by adding a third finger. As soon as he thought Baz was stretched sufficiently, Nick pulled out and maneuvered between Baz’s spread legs. Holding his cock by the base, Nick pressed slowly inside.

  “Whether or not you want to hear it, I love you.”

  Baz nodded. “I know. I’m sorry you had to hear that I love you back in front of everyone. I should’ve told you. I guess there was a part of me that didn’t want to acknowledge it, even to myself.”

  Nick pulled out before easing back in to the root. He stared into Baz’s dark eyes. Damn, I love this man. Baz’s body seemed tighter than it had in the past. Nick had a strong f
eeling it was the shared emotion that made the difference.

  Knowing he could touch and profess his love at any moment was an incredibly freeing feeling. Nick lowered himself to ride against Baz’s firm muscular frame. His lover’s thick cock pressed against Nick’s lower stomach, easing the friction with copious amounts of pre-cum.

  He buried his face against the side of Baz’s neck and tried to remember what it was like to have another lover between them. The difference between Galen and the men they’d shared in the past was love, Baz’s love. Would jealousy over Baz’s feelings come between them?

  “What are you thinking about?” Baz asked.

  “Besides how good your ass feels wrapped around my cock?”

  Baz moaned. “Yeah, besides that.”

  “I’m wondering if I’ll get jealous of Galen or vice versa,” Nick admitted.

  “What if the two of you hit it off and I get jealous?” Baz asked, running his hands down Nick’s back to land on his ass.

  “Hmmm, I hadn’t thought of that.” Nick grinned and bit the side of Baz’s neck. He picked up speed, trying to keep his mind on what he had in his arms presently. There would be plenty of time to worry about if Galen would or wouldn’t fit into their relationship.

  Nick didn’t even know the man, but the story Baz told earlier broke his heart, not only for Baz, but Galen. Wrapped around his lover, thrusting hard and deep, Nick couldn’t imagine watching Baz die, especially at the hands of another.

  He hadn’t said anything to Baz, but Nick was sure there was a reason Galen hadn’t tried to contact Baz. Living in The City wasn’t easy. From everything he’d heard, Galen should be in Heaven. The fact that he wasn’t didn’t bode well for Galen’s frame of mind.

  Baz moved his legs higher on Nick’s back. “Please. I’m on the edge.”

  Nick braced one arm on the bed and lifted his torso enough to get a hand between them to wrap around Baz’s leaking cock. He pressed his thumb against the slit as he closed his mouth over Baz’s. The kiss was deep, complete with dueling tongues and scraping teeth.

  Baz broke their kiss as his body bucked up against Nick. “Fuck!”